Why Social Media is Bad for Women
for more reasons than just men...
After reading
’s latest article, “Digital Purdah as a Solution to Female Internet Brain,” I was inspired to sit down at 3 AM and pen my thoughts. In his piece, he delves into the concerning impact of social media on women's mental health, suggesting a rise in childlessness by 2030 as a result. This hypothesis merits consideration, given the escalating prevalence of neuroses among women attributed to social media use.However, he gets that statistic wrong per the article he cited. He is correct that many working-age women are predicted to be considerably childless, but citing Morgan Stanley’s predictions for future childlessness in women is an error. Morgan Stanley doesn’t say that women are predicted to be childless; instead, it says they will be single. Many women are pursuing nature’s call without a man in tow. It would have been better to cite The Birth Gap documentary1. Many commentators get this inference wrong; I’ve seen Morgan Stanley championed as the canary in the coal mine on the childlessness epidemic—but while the statistic is correct, the citation is wrong.
It is true that globally, once a woman is 30 years old without a child, there is a 50% chance she will not become a mother. Given that the age of marriage and reproduction for women continues to rise, with the current age for first marriage for a woman in the US being 28 and the standardized mean age of motherhood being 30.7 years old in the UK—yes, about half of working age women are likely to be single OR childless by 2045.
Definitively, we are headed toward a world without children's laughter ringing through our neighborhoods. We are already in a world where marriage is held in low regard. What could possibly go wrong?
But women do not care. THEY EMPHATICALLY DO NOT CARE. I cannot emphasize this enough. I have been talking about this crisis since I was in undergrad, and nearly no women in real life or online truly take this data or reality to heart. They genuinely think they won’t be the neurotic women in old age who are throwing themselves off balconies in Japan out of loneliness. I have given up on warning women entirely.
Social media is terrible for women for more reasons than just men…
I figured upon reading
’s latest as a woman who is in the 92nd percentile in neuroticism, I would chime in. For the past several years on social media, I haven’t played into the male gaze sexually. I may have vied for men’s attention intellectually online. That is a strong case one could make, but I believe I would like to talk to intelligent women more, and I cannot find many, unfortunately.Moving on, if you look at my Instagram profile or if you have been following it for a while, I have rarely posted a provocative picture—if at all. I have been in two separate committed monogamous relationships throughout my twenties, starting at 19. As a woman who never vied for the sexual male gaze2 online, I can say social media is a detriment to women regardless. If a woman is neurotic or comparative, it can truly warp her mind. I’ve experienced this firsthand. I want to say I have met well-adjusted women who work online, but they are rare.
It’s just so somber for a woman online.
I signed up for Instagram when I was 24. I did not have Instagram prior because of multiple negative experiences with social media as a teenager, leading me to swear it off for a few years. I signed up again because I joined the military and wanted to keep up with family and friends; at the time, it seemed Facebook was the appropriate solution.
I am a millennial who was given access to the internet at a young age when Myspace, Tumblr, Twitter, and Instagram first dropped. This first occurred when I was around 12 years old. This exposure destroyed my generation irreparably, and I’m not sure anyone can quite understand it. It’s one of those things where, you had to have been there.
By that, I mean it was the first time I could remember it became a regular occurrence for a pre-teen or teen girl to send naked photos to males in school and have them leaked school system-wide (this is a county-level, by the way). In hindsight, the girls I witnessed this happen with were vulnerable. These girls didn’t have fathers and had working single mothers, but also, when they grew up… They didn’t fare well either. Now that I’m approaching 30, it seems to me, from the outside looking in, that many of those girls never had a chance.
That’s a compelling situation to be in. To vie for a male peer’s attention, send a sexually forward photo and have them paraded around like baseball cards. How does a teen girl approach her parents with this? Several girls decided it was better to suffer in silence. They never even bothered to take it to the school administration—but what would a public school do? It really did seem at some point in the public school system, schools became so inclusive they couldn’t condemn bullies, especially when they should have. That’s not even to address the teen boys who leaked these photos; I don’t think they understood the severity of their actions. What one boy will do alone is far different from what 5 boys would do together unsupervised.
At that age, I never dreamed there would be a world with AI-generated porn of women to contend with. However, I did meet one girl when I was 15 who had a photoshop-generated photo of her head on a porn actress’s body. She showed it to me and seemed to feel bad about it—and I kid you not, she later turned out to be a promiscuous drug addict.
I can’t even begin to tell you how bad this e-world is for women. It’s awful, but we literally can’t function without cell phones to exist in this world. I am currently on the hunt for a flip phone to isolate my smartphone to content creation only.
The emergence of social media and smartphones took school bullying and female sexual competition from solely existing in the schoolyard and brought it into our homes. I can’t even blame my parents for not mediating because they never grew up with social media. Upon reflection, I think they were mostly bewildered to see my erratic behavior, and I’m not sure they ever connected it to cyberbullying crossing over from the real world.
But the cyberbullying never stopped. One day, I woke up, and I was approaching 30, and it was the same e-drama nonsense I’d been dealing with since I was 13.
The male gaze aside, social media is still bad for women—and it’s because of other women.
A few years ago, I made the YouTube video linked HERE that discusses how the algorithm encourages body dysmorphia in young girls. It wasn’t until I got ridiculously fit in my early twenties that I realized… Most fitness models on Instagram likely weren’t fertile with such low body fat percentages; given their low body fat percentages and large breasts, most had to have had augmentations. My mind was blown when a man I was in a relationship with opened my eyes to this fact. These women who were the vision of fitness all had work done.
This was my immediate algorithm exposure on Instagram, by the way. I remember signing up, checking my age as 24 and being a woman, and my feed was immediately populated with fitness models. I thought to myself, “This is strange. I don’t know a lot of women who look this way in real life.” It is because I had this connection to reality that I didn’t feel badly about the algorithm flashing hot girls in front of my face. I would not say I am so immune anymore because it worsens…
I recently decided to delve into digital entrepreneurship and found that even when women are not vying for men sexually online and they are opening digital businesses, appearances still matter significantly. Appearances are tied to economic success, even when a man is not the buyer. This is precisely why there is a craze of female entrepreneurs trying to learn faceless digital marketing on Instagram (which is hilarious because this has been done on Twitter for years, but millennial women are forever behind trends on Instagram).
I have found that most women with businesses online have work done. I am an ugly, rebellious woman online*. I refuse to get Botox, lip fillers, veneers, breast augmentations, BBLs, liposuction—you name it, I’m not doing it. I feel a personal obligation to age naturally, given the state of the world for women today. I do not want to compete with augmented or AI-generated women because it’s a never-ending journey. One procedure turns into five, turns into ten, and then you look like a clown. I’m not opening that Pandora’s Box.
*It’s literally just online that I’m considered horrendous.
I had no idea that women working in social media with unsuccessful companies were forking over considerable3 finances to “look young.” Why do you need Botox and lip fillers if your content and products are objectively valuable? Why can’t that stand on its own?
I’m not sure if most women realize the extent of modifications your average female social media account holder has because it took me until I was 25 to understand most fitness models had breast implants, and it took me even LONGER to realize that most women, male gaze or not, had Botox and lip fillers online. I remember the first time a girlfriend told me she got Botox done behind her man’s back. I thought her smooth skin was natural and gorgeous and envied it! It is important to note that we are seeing more and more women at younger ages getting Botox as a PREVENTATIVE.
They’re getting it in their 20s, so they don’t get wrinkles in their 40s, which is mindblowing. Women will put that much forethought into stalling aging but won’t put that much forethought into marriage and motherhood.
Let’s move on to the comparative feminine entrepreneurial mind.
This is what I mean by, no matter the niche, no matter the age, social media is cancer for a woman’s mind. When I got into digital entrepreneurship and attempted to strategize my monetization, my algorithm on Instagram changed into something I had never seen before. Of course, it was the same toxicity, just in a different niche.
Botox, lashes, and lip fillers aside, the conflated income claims of female entrepreneurs will plague a woman’s mind. Even I have been struggling with this new propaganda. The reality of monetization and digital entrepreneurship is that about 12% make a barely livable wage.
Monetization is a challenge in a world where people will make content for attention regardless of compensation. Brands even know this and will solicit creators for collaborations for free in exchange for products. Creators are akin to e-slaves, working hard to succeed with lackluster compensation.
You might ask, ”If that’s the case, why do you still work here?”
I’m still here because once, a professor I held in high regard looked at me in my face with a serious stare and said, “I think you will make 200K a year on YouTube.” He genuinely meant that, and I’ve never had anyone tell me I had the potential to reach astronomical success before.
He is a world-renowned anthropologist who showed me how to make videos in order to make documentaries. So, I keep showing up here until that $200K happens... Maybe it will happen, maybe it won’t. I am an e-girl Indiana Jones looking for a Golden Chalice. I’ll keep you posted on whether I ever complete the obstacle course to get to the chalice.
But anyway, women are removed from reality when they pursue digital entrepreneurship. They think they should earn more because they haven’t seen the raw data. They come across a Reel on Instagram that says they can make money working 1 hour a day and jump on the offer. They don’t understand it takes years to get to a sustainable business model, let alone a profitable one. It will be YEARS before you can work one hour a day on your phone. (Or one hour on your laptop at 3 AM while your family sleeps.)
For female digital entrepreneurs, when it’s been months and they haven’t made a single sale and are incurring overhead losses, they feel like they’ve done something wrong. They haven’t done anything wrong per se; it just might be that they 1) aren’t cut out for the work to begin with or 2) they haven’t allowed themselves enough time to reach sustainability.
Anyway, social media is bad for women overall, and this was my final testimony to the latest propaganda I saw when my algorithm shifted to purely entrepreneurial content. I have to say, it’s been stressful. I always think I have the algorithm figured out and that I’ve adjusted and am good to go. Then I go on another digital adventure, and a new Goliath appears.
“275 Done-for-You Digital Templates you can Resell INSTANTLY!”
“100 Ways to Go Viral with 4-SECOND REELS!”
“How I launched my 7-fig Biz in 6 MONTHS!”
It’s been absolutely maddening to deal with lately, which is precisely why I’m getting a flip phone.
So what happens to the women who aren’t married and don’t have children? What happens to them with a phone in their hands? Do they augment their bodies and pursue failing business models to their financial detriment?
I bet they do.
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I use Speechify to have my articles read to me so I can better proofread them because my eyes get worn out after re-reading them so many times! Below is a link for 50% ($60) off annually to get you signed up through my affiliate link.
This documentary has three parts; the last two are behind a paywall. I suggest you watch it for a comprehensive understanding of the epidemic of singleness and childlessness in men and women. It might be depressing, though. Fair warning.
I haven’t even gotten around to telling you how I cannot go down any social media rabbit hole without seeing naked women. On Instagram, you can feign having your breasts out for “educational” purposes to demonstrate breastfeeding as a way to funnel coomers to your OnlyFans page.
Extensions are $700, nails are $100, lip filler is $500, Botox is $200, and lashes are $100. This is an insane overhead cost for a business that requires looksmaxxing.
Most small new businesses fail within 5 years. There's no reason why internet businesses should be any different.
It really is sad. I watch so many women at the gym wear clothing that you would expect from a hooker walking the street. Then they get pissed at you if you look at them and make derogatory remarks. I told one that if she didn't want looked at maybe she shouldn't come to the gym wearing clothing that from the distance made her look naked!
I was fortunate to marry a woman that wanted children and went through the pain of childbirth four times with the record being an 11 pound baby boy. Four sons that have been quite a blessing to us. She would have never traded it away. Fortunately I understood the law of attraction from early on and was able to support four children and a wife on my earnings.
She left a job as a registered nurse and homeschooled all four sons over a 20 year period. She wouldn't have had it any other way! As a matter of fact, at one point after the last one left the nest she did everything she needed to do to become a registered nurse again and literally said she had night mares thinking about it and stayed unemployed. Some times you have to sacrifice nice toys in this world to have a decent real life. We never built or owned a new home. We purchased an older home and even to this day it is a work in progress. Same with cars. The newest car I've bough in years was six years old with 80K on the clock. But what the heck. The original owner paid 65K for it and I paid 19K. His loss! For any of you women on here reading this...as a man, my perspective is, children are the most blessing you can EVER have. Holding that baby, and nursing it is what the creator made you for. He/she/it whatever....didn't make you to work in an office as some sort of executive to make lots of worthless money to buy worthless items that literally wear you out and make you old way ahead of time. Remember, you can't take it with you. Make your pursuit of happiness what our creator made you for. To be a mother. To watch a baby girl or baby boy grow into a woman or man that will understand that certain things in life are priceless and being a mother and a father is one of them. Why do you think they want to destroy the family unit? Because they want you to depend on the government for your existence. So that you'll be a good slave. So that you'll believe that if your child joins the military that they are doing something good and not really being involved in murder.
If anti social media is hooking you, break free and be a real person not a brain dead controlled zombie like "they" would have us all be. Jus Meum Tuebor